The words of a song by the second most beautiful woman in the world bounced around my two remaining brain cells. "Oops I did it again'. Yes indeed I had. Having fallen back in love with kayaking after my recent trip to the Slate Isles, I'd again booked with Gethin, (Sea Kayaking Wales). This time was for what was described as 'Dynamic water' training, winds of force 4 and above, tidal currents of 2+ knots. (Moderate to advanced conditions) Sounded like a brilliant idea from the warmth and comfort of my expensive leather chair with leopard skin throw at home.

Sitting in my kayak looking out from the safe area under a cliff face at the waves rolling into the Cemaes bay on the north side of Anglesey, I managed something akin to multi tasking. I thought back to my old school reports, most of which were understandably less than complementary but the general theme being, 'Roger does not try hard enough/could do better'. I'd travelled to Anglesey arriving the day before, then met Gethin, his more than able assistant Helen, and the rest of the group for a briefing 9am Friday. Introductions over, location options, wind speed, tide times, sea movement and sea conditions were all discussed and Cemaes bay was the decision. This area would have dynamic water, decent swells, surfing and the all important safe areas. With winds force 4 gusting 6 from the north forecast I couldn't help but think 'dynamic water' was an understatement.

Arriving at the bay I packed my boat. Safety kit shoved into hatches and the all-important salmonella special for lunch, pasta and chicken. I'd opted to wear a dry suit with an all in one fleece underneath (which I'd only taken with me in case I needed to sleep in it!) and rash vest. Crash hats were a requirement. Tucked into my buoyancy aid pocked was my new for this trip, waterproof camera.

Close in, the sea conditions were benign. Looking out to the far side of the bay though, the seas were breaking. Once we were all on the water and warmed up, after a quick regroup we paddling out towards the bigger stuff regrouping again on the outer edge of the bay in the last of the calm water. 

The waters around Anglesey are quite complex, very changeable and often don't conform to the usual tidal patterns. This particular bay, when the tide ebbed, was one huge eddy, perhaps 1 kilometer square. As the current passed the bay heading south, the bay effectively drained from both the north and the south. This meant, once in the lumpy water, if anyone were to go in, they would still be drawn into the bay, not out to sea.

The plan was to pair up, have a play in the bigger water then do a bit of surfing, paddle back out and repeat. In the past I have paddled in bigger swells but I don't profess to be a surfer. , given a bit of time I'm pretty confident in most conditions. This however was, to say the least a baptism of fire.

The raw power of nature never ceases to amaze me. Sitting in a kayak, (through choice!) being picked up by a swell and hurtled, in my case with very little control, in the direction of land is a strange feeling. I'd like to say I'd mastered the surfing technique but the truth is, good old mother nature was having the last laugh and I was doing little more than hanging on.

The more I tried, the less confident I became.

The worst thing that could happen would be to go over and take a swim, because rolling in those conditions was pretty unlikely.I didn't fancy that too much so on too many occasions headed to the safe area. 

From my school reports;

'Poor. More effort is required' (French, 1969), 

'Roger is too often more interested in distracting others than getting on with his work' (History, 1970),'Roger is capable of good work but he is not always prepared to make the necessary effort' (Chemistry/Physics/Biology, 1971) 'Roger is capable but unless he applies himself more, his examination results will be dismal' (General report 1972), 

'Roger works no harder than he has to. With a more determined and careful approach he could do very much better' (Geography 1971)

Yes, thank you Sweyne School Rayleigh! 

After lunch Gethin suggested we circumnavigate Rhoscolyn beacon, a rock formation split in various places giving ample safe refuges and a tide race on the far side. 'You can lead Roger' were the words I didn't want to hear, but did. In these circumstances, leading is undertaken from the front, primarily to seek out the best/safest route. 'Like lambs to the slaughter' was the phrase that sprang to mind.

I'd seen the water on the far side as we approached. It wasn't just a swell. It was fast moving from our right, appeared to be boiling with the chop going in every direction with a bit of white water thrown in for good measure. A quick regroup and we headed into it. Some of the swells were enough to hide the other paddlers momentarily, which indicates as a rule of thumb that they were 1 meter plus. (The swells, not the paddlers). We were paddling against an ebbing tide and when I looked to my right it was apparent we were making slow progress. As I've said before, not everyone's idea of fun, but I was thoroughly enjoying myself. Once round the island we regrouped. 'Well done everybody, let's go back again but anticlockwise this time. Carry on Roger!' Off we set. This time though a bit of surfing practice was thrown into the mix for good measure until we rounded the far end of the island and out of the tide race, into calmer water and headed for the beach.

Sunday, we headed towards South Stack, an area sided by dramatic cliffs and a tide race which if approached wrongly will almost certainly result in a swim and a long chase by your would be rescuers.

I know because I've been swimming there twice in one afternoon on a previous visit. (Thanks Nigel for the outstanding rescues!)  We paddled along the coast, regrouping where necessary. As we did so, across a huge bay, the swell coming in from our left was on occasions reaching heights of 3 metres. (My best guess) These were not breaking waves so it was just a matter of paddling and they pass under you. It became more interesting when we changed direction slightly, was out of the bigger swells and into smaller sharper ones. We did a loop of the bay and headed back towards home. Again conditions changed, not drastically, but enough to keep it interesting. A bit of surfing practice was called for before we entered the last bay and headed back to the beach and finish. 

Washing my kit down back at the camp site it dawned on me that my waterproof camera hadn't seen the light of day since I'd arrived. Fear not good readers, numerous photos were taken, lots of which include me. Even luckier, most of them are of my good side and from a long way away. 

All in all, despite a slightly nervous start, a brilliant weekend. Will I be going back? You can bet your life on it. 

Roger